Sons of Empire!

An informative Pictograph concerning chiefly Warhammer 40,000's Legion of Illustrious Space Victorians! (Warning: Also contains divers depictions of Johnny Alien and criminal foreigners of varying sorts. Serious risk of fainting for ladies and the mentally infirm.)

Location: United Kingdom

Sunday, July 08, 2007

Lovely Buildings (this article certified as suitable for ladies)

As any reader with a fragment of intellect will know, it is not simply the goal of the Sons of Empire to thrash the upstart alien in battle – although by golly they are good at doing so. Once the garbling, tentacled foe has been sufficiently pummelled, he must be helped rise to civilisation, generally by having “his” land occupied and managed by decent, proper folk.

In order to carry out this important task, the borders of the Empire are protected by forts very much like the one you see below. This is Sons of Empire outpost 203. As can be seen, the outpost is made of solid brick and steel, and has lifting facilities, air filtration systems, an autocannon and a privy on the roof.

Inside, we can see that there is a workshop on the ground floor, where weapons and armour are prepared, and a restroom, where fellows can gather and swap stories of bold combat in a wholesome, manly atmosphere. Note the trophies, taken from a wide range of (now) obscure alien fauna. Ladies are of course not allowed.

Power for the outpost is provided by pumping stations like the one you see here. This station draws water and energy from the local well, and stores it ready for war, peace and even hygiene. Clean, modern and efficient, buildings like this stand out among – and often on top of – the rude huts and ugly concrete lumps that aliens create.

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Dear Prudence

Our readers will no doubt recall the three-legged alien horror revealed in our previous instalment. How, one might ask, could such a terrible device be halted? Surely such a titanic war engine could stride through a human city at will, looting and wrecking with the ghastly abandon of a pauper looking for a "knees up"?

In which case, ladies and gentlemen, look no further. Be of good cheer and behold Prudence, the Leviathan-class main battle landship.

The Leviathan carries two twin-linked laser cannons on its side, which have already proved invaluable in destroying the poorly-constructed fortifications of the dastardly Moon-man. The roof turret sports a pair of large Maxim cannons, ideal for dishing out a bit of no good to Johnny Moonlander, should he choose to make a close attack. In addition, the Leviathan can seat ten stout-hearted soldiers, who can provide extra locomotion by pushing it should its highly-reliable atom engine fall becalmed.

Everywhere Prudence goes she is greeted with awe by our enemies and cheers of approval by our stalwart citizens. At her frontage aliens throw down their weapons and beg clemency. Behind her follows a stream of urchins, eager to seize the glowing atom-coals as they fall out of the reactor, to sell them off on their barrows later on. God bless the Empire!

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